By Pearl Eyitayo
What does women have to offer in a relationships, I keep asking myself. I am pretty sure you have heard a statement like this before.
“After sex some girls have nothing else to offer”. (IT HELL NO). Incase you have that mentality I am here to tell you ladies something you can offer In a relationship apart from sex;
*A man want a woman who is loyal and committed, someone to share experience with and have intellectual conversation with.
A man want a woman that challenge him, that inspire him to be the best man he can be, someone that gives him reason to smile everyday
To be able to look up to him and respect him as her man.
To feel loved and appreciated.
To feel accepted for who she is deep down inside.
To feel supported.
To feel like she’s beautiful in his eyes.
To feel that the love between her and her man is growing stronger and deeper over time.
To feel safe knowing that her man is guiding them both to a better future.
To grow together as a couple, rather than one person improving and getting better while the other one stays the same.
To be going in the same direction (e.g. having the same dreams, goals, plans for the future).
To be able to trust him (and him to trust her).
To be able to relax into her feminine self knowing that he’s the man and he is the one wearing the pants in the relationship.
To have open communication without needing to hide things from each other.
To be able to laugh and have fun together.
To be made to feel special once on a while (e.g. by being treated to a special dinner, going away on a vacation together)
To feel heard and valued. And the last one is Tender
- T for Tender Actions – Honesty in a relationship is one thing; brutal honesty quite another. Some may be just too sensitive to survive that brutal honesty and so it’s important to be tender and gentle with loved ones.
- E for Emotional Communication – Communicate what comes straight from the heart, something that has no agenda and is not an attempt to wrest control from the other.
Be generous and giving in a relationship and be trusting that your efforts will be reciprocated.
- SkN is for Notice – How your partner feels; be sensitive to their feels of being overwhelmed or hurt. Don’t be so embroiled in your own life and feelings that you become insensitive to those of your partner. Just a kind word here or there could make a world of difference.
- D is for Develop a code – This can be a special, intimate, secret thing between couples that no one else is privy to – a touch, a look, a word, is all it should take.
- E is for Easy does it – Remember healing takes time, so if a partner has had a setback, be patient and help to heal the wounds.
- R is for Respond with consideration – don’t apportion blame and condemn, don’t make it about the other person being wrong. Finding fault and doing so consistently can hurt the very basis of a relationship, so proceed with care.
- N is for Never be mean – If the person means something to you, never be mean, never belittle – it can be damaging to the other person’s sense of self worth.
- E is for entice – Bring the romance back into your relationship by enticing your partner to be more romantic. Set the mood right from the time you get up in the morning and then build up to a wonderful evening.
- S is for sympathy – Offering of sympathy is important because it helps your partner feel secure and connected with you; helps them feel that here is the sort of comfort they cannot hope to find anywhere else in the world.
- S is for Safety – Make your partner feel secure and safe with you, make it easier for them to express tenderness towards you, with your own tender actions